| Picture and Name Click on the thumbnail to see a larger version of the picture. |
Residence | Religion | Occupation | Not Into | Last S.O. | Humor | Looks | Age | Weaknesses | Knowledgeable About |
| Cooperative, Chicago. | No. | Journalist. | Men | was six months into a new relationship before informing Lawton | dry as a good martini |
6 ft, goatee, Shakespearian hairline, Roman nose |
43 (looks 42) | action-adventure films, progressive politics, novels, bad taste in women (see Last girlfriend) | micro beers, fiction, crime & local politics (which in Chicago are closely related) | |
| His stuff lives in various shared apartments, he often lives on location. But realistically the best place find Theo is in his 2002 Subaru Impreza wagon somewhere on an interstate highway going 20 mph over the speed limit. | Hmmm? We're pretty sure he's heard of those but he is, as we all know, a very, very slow adaptor. | Photographer. Best Boy. | Men, soy based products, patchouli, the "yoga scene." | Define significant? | The slightest shade sarcastic, and specializing in self-deprication. | Around occasionally, but is the victim of acute tunnel vision. | 30 | Golf, cigarettes, and fashionable women. And let's not get started on the cameras. | Cooking, though you'd never know it from his weight. Rock climbing, though he's terrified of heights. Music, though he's amazingly tone-deaf. Relationships, though he always maintains that he's single. | |
| Apartment in the Midwest with two cats | Agnostic, leaning towards Wiccan | Sign language interpreter | People who take themselves (or anything, really) too seriously, homophobes, kids, spiders, getting wasted *every* night (preferably every *other*), boring stuff | Eccchhh. | Very silly/goofy, occassionally offensive, a fan of farting and belching | I'm Angelina Jolie's twin. No, really. Honest. *watches sky for lightning bolt* | Almost 30 *sigh* | Scary movies, Ryan Reynolds, emotion-manipulating musical scores (damn you John Williams), acerbic humor, British accents, Irish accents, New Zealand accents, Austrailian accents | Movies. Actors. Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon. Buffy. Harry Potter. |
©
J.K. Brown 2007
unless otherwise noted
Plastic Tinsel Joy is, at least in part, a work of parody and should not be relied upon for strictly factual information. And we're not telling you which parts are parody.
